This week hadn’t been the best but becoming a Brain Tumour Charity ambassador and fundraising with the Maggies Centre had been enjoyable/ fun yo an extent. I do love helping but sometimes it can become too much. I was sat at Maggies quite emotionally. I know why I’m there and you find a lot of competing from people who’s had if worse. I’ll be honest   the ones that have it worse don’t compete. There’s 2 of us still on treatment and 2 of us with a terrible prognosis, so I know it’s hard but be tactful.

I am struggling mentally,  everything seems to be happening at once. My twin brother is moving to Uniiversity in London I should be moving but I can’t  I’m doing open university at home, my brother is moving into year 11 and I feel left behind on treatment.  I find it really difficult and I do cry and thing “why now?’

I do sag things I don’t mean because I’m jealous or I want to do it. But I know in reality I can’t and I’m proud of them. I’m struggling but I shouldn’t hold anyone back and I know that.

They’ve got a life and I mustn’t spoil it.

3 thoughts on “Competition

  1. You are a lovely human being, never apologise for being you. None of us can be in your shoes. Just be yourself, thats who we all love. Xx


  2. Mathew we are in this together, I had a little weep the other day. I man who I hardly know but have coached his boys was sorting me out a raffle prize. I said why you doing this really you hardly know me. Liam you were always there for the boys every weekend that deserves respect. This man captained his country at rugby. For some reason that really got me. People love and respect you we will always be there (unless I beat you too it) as my wife Jen says to me, so what you can not what you want to do, you’re not that person at thee moment. Both you and I have been poisoning our bodies for 18months now obviously for our health. Let’s be as emotional as we want

    Liked by 1 person

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